So, we landed with no further expelling of fluids. And off to explore Hanoi's nightlife! Except that my stomach was still cramping up and the area near our hotel seemed totally dead. I went right to bed and Stevhan went off to forage for supplies. I guess after nine pm, you can get a prostitute but not cigarettes or a Pepsi. Priorities.

The next day I felt much better, but still kinda weak. Stev was suffering from sympathy diarrhea, so we took it slow and steady. We explored the Old Quarter of the city,



































which used to be walled in, to keep all the dollar store treasures in, I suppose. It was like going through a giant, labrynthian Dollar Tree, except outside, exotic, and with delicious food. In the two days we were there, we bought an umbrella, two lamps, embroidered wallets, bras, fake Pumas, and a pack of Vinataba cigarettes (What the artists smoke!). If I wanted to, I could've bought: A giant pink lotus lamp,
a puppy,









exotic vegetables, hot pink Buddha paintings, snake wine, plastic cups, and a woman.
I'm sorry there's so few photos of this area, but you had to keep your wits about you to avoid being hit by a motorbike.

Hanoi has a cosmopolitan feel to it among the French and Chinese influenced architecture....



















(the view from Hoan Kiem lake)




























Yeah, duh. It was the capitol of French Indochina from 1887-1945 (Thank God for Wikipedia. Making dumbasses sound like history buffs since 2001.)
























Even the Commie posters have a slight retro vibe:















And something about the people here. All these hip, chic Vietnamese girls would be out, riding their lemon yellow Vespas. There's a proliferation of art galleries and designer boutiques. There's an art scene starting to brew, but mainly what we saw were a lot of shops that could make you your very own Rothko reproduction or turn that dusty old GlamorShots photo into a 32x24 oil painting to hang above the mantlepiece.
In the evening, couples would be out strolling around the lake. I ate a delicious chocolate n' strawberry gelato and Stev enjoyed a beer at a lakeside bistro. The next night we got pizza with a perfect thin crust (and from a real live Italian ex-pat!) Que romantico!


















We did some other stuff, like a take a peek at the Temple of Literature, (something about this place being the seat of Confucian learning or something. I dunno, I was looking for the gift shop.)


































and get scammed by a taxi driver. We thought about getting our ears cleaned at this shack by this twelve year old girl with a miner's light on her head (man, I wish I'd gotten a picture of that!), but we had to get moving on.

On our last day, we dived back into the Old Quarter again for dinner at Little Saigon. The restaurant was hidden away in an alley, but when we got there it was packed. And with good reason. The food there was, yup, so fucking good. We had these roll-your-on rice paper rolls,












some delicious sesame beef and veggies, and cold, cold beer.

Then we wandered around the alleys,
















until we pulled up a plastic stool and had 2,000 dong beer on the curb, along with all the other (cool) backpackers. If 16,000 dong is the dollar equivalent, that makes it what, a dime beer? A penny? You do the math. It was good n' cheap and we had a lovely chat with an Irish dude.

And of course we had to stop and drink at this bar,

















because they ordered us to:















We did a couple shots of whiskey. For the puppy.

We were sorry to go but we had a train to Hue to catch at 11pm.

We got to the station,













and stocked up on beer and snacks and got in our car. Even though our compartment was tiny











(how they manage to cram six beds in, I don't know),


it was still in keeping with the Romantic Hanoi theme. We had two nice guys in the compartment telling us about livin' it up in Vietnam. There was weird and terrible music playing (Veitnamese pop and Celine Dion) and down the hall, dudes had their impromptu drinking parties set up. I popped a Xanex and fell asleep, lulled by some bizarre French music.

The next morning, I woke up and looked out my window. There was lush, green countryside everywhere. Snaking rivers bordered by misty mountains, people in conical hats working in the rice fields. I wanted to get off the train, hop a bike and take a good look around. I broke my rule once again and took a ton of stupid pictures from the window. You guys only have to look at one:







Not even close to representing the beauty of the landscape. Next time, I'm getting off for a closer look.




We arrived in Hue. It was only a day stop on our way to Hoi An. It was rainy outside, so we took the time to explore and enjoy the amenities in our room. Well, Stev did.



















While he was in the shower, I did a little channel surfing and came across these beauties:
















It looked like a girl group singing Vietnamese worker songs in a refinery or mining camp or something. They had matching sparkly kerchiefs and sometimes would be hanging off the equipment or steel bars. What is this? Who are they? Are Commie girl bands the next pop sensation? Just remember, you heard it here first.

Nothing much else happened other than meeting these cool kids who stopped their soccer game so they could jump around in front of the camera and whoop and holler some English gibberish.
















Oh yeah, and we also found some other cool kids and played badminton with them in dark (and near a busy street. Dangerous!), then cooled off at another curbside joint with a beer. Unfortunately, no photographic evidence of this amusing interlude exists.
At 7am the next morning, we caught another bus to Hoi An. And when we got there.... well, let's just say we were kicking ourselves for not having spent our whole time here. Shit, you know what? It's gonna have to be a four-parter. There was just too much cool stuff that happened there. Stay tuned....