Christmas has come and gone here in the future. Here's how my day went down:
-Awoke to a grey, rainy day. Called Stevhan and opened my presents that he had sent me. I squealed with delight at my little toys and Ali G dvd.
-Went to work and sat around reading 'American Gods'. Around lunchtime, I received a fat envelope of money. I hi-fived the office clerk like I always do on payday and went to the bank.
-Did fifty pushups in the training room at school. What? I did!
-Had a delicious X-mas dinner of breaded pork cutlet and an ice cream sandwich, just like I always wanted to since I was five.
It's been a pretty rad Christmas.
I've had plenty of time to reflect in the last six months and especially about 2006. Except for about two months in early Spring (the douchebag shall not be named), it's been an amazingly wonderful year. I moved to a new city, met the man of my dreams (or rather, the 'What I Want In A Man' list I made whilst eating brunch one morn), and moved to a beautiful island in Japan. I've experienced great kindness, tasted disgusting fish, and had the luxury of taking morning dips in the ocean. I'm so fuh-reaking thankful. I feel like I'm on an upward trend here, so I'm gonna hazard a guess that 2007 will be just as sweet as this year, if not sweeter.
Of course all this happiness and personal growth and shit could not have been made without my boyfriend, friends, and family. Thank you for making me a better person. I love you all and I hope six great things happen to you all next year. Happy Holidays.
(ugh, gross. I'm gonna barf from all the saccharine.)
Monday, December 25, 2006
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Happy Old Year
Ah, Christmas. A time of joy and gift-giving and fucking in love motels.
Wait, wha?
Yes, a Japanese Chrstmas is more for the couples, who use the holiday as an excuse to sneak off to a themed love motel of their choice. How will you celebrate the birth of Christ? A 'Pirates of the Carribean' style adventure? Bondage Room? Or perhaps a playful Hello Kitty Boudoir?
It's New Year's Day that's the family holiday here. You spend the day with the family, eating a traditional meal called osechi, particular foods that help bring good luck throughout the year.
So, even though I'm away from friends and family at this time, I don't feel too bad. I'm not wandering the streets of Kozu dressed in rags, peering into family gatherings, and wiping away a single solitary tear.
I did make a little X-mas corner
and yes it does look quite pathetic. The Christmas cards are from some of the very sweet girl students, including this one with a comic.
Cute!
And no, those presents aren't dried fish that I wrapped myself in a fit of insanity. My man sent me presents so I had something to open on Christmas. That's why he's the best boyfriend in the world. (You know what? It's my blog and I can be as sugar-fucking-plum sweet as I wanna be).
And of course, there's a slew of Christmas, or rather Happy Old Year parties to attend. Co-workers gather together to eat, highlight the past year's memorable events, and get wasted. I wish I had a picture of the science teacher swishing around in a sparkly party hat and sash, or the PE teacher drunkenly swaying to the soothing sounds of 'Immigrant Song' at the karaoke bar. But alas, I left the camera at home.
Last night, I went to the Ladies Teachers' Party and that was a little more tame, although it was kinda weird hearing them reminisce about the weight gain and then look pointedly at me. I just smiled an idiotic gaijin smile and shoveled more yakisoba in my mouth. It's not like any of these women are obese or even overweight. One woman told me (in her broken English) that she was proud of her broad shoulders and chest. I hi-fived her and we both had second-helpings of fried rice.
(Later, I was told that it was a joke that the junior high teachers were in on. Okaaaay.)
BUT THEN! I went to the kindergarden principle's private party with Kyu-san and Mori-san.
It was hilarious.
They opened up the restaurant for the six older dudes and one waitress hovered about making sure everybody's drink was full. When we arrived, there was a loud cheer and more glasses brought out. Mori-san was made to sit between this dude
Kyu-san was seated there
and I was wedged in between two chain-smoking men with bad teeth and big smiles.
It was like I was a combination of escort/life of the party/geisha, which I think is how many Japanese women are viewed at in parties such as this one. That's certainly how hostess clubs work. And I felt weird, but seeing as the guys weren't trying to feel me up or anything, I decided to enjoy myself.
There was of course karaoke and seeing as this was the over-fifty crowd, I worked the room with classics such as 'Mandie' and 'Yesterday'. The dudes were all about it. One guy came up to do air guitar (with 'Mandie'? Aw, let a guy dream). The principal did drums with chopsticks and an empty water bottle. I got the waitress to sing 'Beat It' with me (she even had moves!)
and we all went nuts. I mean, these guys are grown men and they were running around like high schoolers,
accusing each other of being perverts or taking it in the butt.
Or making silly face. And this guy's a principal!
Their karaoke consisted mainly of Enka (a classic, 'country-style' genre that older Japanese go nuts over. It's pretty cheesy. Think 70s shlock).
There was also this bizarre English tune. I had no idea what it was about.
Whenever I'd be sitting down, I'd get a barrage of questions. Sometimes the waitress would try to help with a little translating and if they ever got inappropriate, she'd say, "Bye-bye!" and get up to serve someone else. She was cool like that. Kyu-san and Mori-san kept mouthing, "Daijobu? (No problem?)" and I'd raise my glass of sparkling apple wine and say "Kampai!".
I had a kickass time with these dudes, but I was exhausted from all the smiling and attempts at conversation. Some gaijin are employed as exotic hostesses. I couldn't possibly put up with this hostessing shit night after night and not all Japanese men are as cool as these guys. I walked home, mixed myself a Bloody Mary and called it a night.
Wait, wha?
Yes, a Japanese Chrstmas is more for the couples, who use the holiday as an excuse to sneak off to a themed love motel of their choice. How will you celebrate the birth of Christ? A 'Pirates of the Carribean' style adventure? Bondage Room? Or perhaps a playful Hello Kitty Boudoir?
It's New Year's Day that's the family holiday here. You spend the day with the family, eating a traditional meal called osechi, particular foods that help bring good luck throughout the year.
So, even though I'm away from friends and family at this time, I don't feel too bad. I'm not wandering the streets of Kozu dressed in rags, peering into family gatherings, and wiping away a single solitary tear.
I did make a little X-mas corner
and yes it does look quite pathetic. The Christmas cards are from some of the very sweet girl students, including this one with a comic.
Cute!
And no, those presents aren't dried fish that I wrapped myself in a fit of insanity. My man sent me presents so I had something to open on Christmas. That's why he's the best boyfriend in the world. (You know what? It's my blog and I can be as sugar-fucking-plum sweet as I wanna be).
And of course, there's a slew of Christmas, or rather Happy Old Year parties to attend. Co-workers gather together to eat, highlight the past year's memorable events, and get wasted. I wish I had a picture of the science teacher swishing around in a sparkly party hat and sash, or the PE teacher drunkenly swaying to the soothing sounds of 'Immigrant Song' at the karaoke bar. But alas, I left the camera at home.
Last night, I went to the Ladies Teachers' Party and that was a little more tame, although it was kinda weird hearing them reminisce about the weight gain and then look pointedly at me. I just smiled an idiotic gaijin smile and shoveled more yakisoba in my mouth. It's not like any of these women are obese or even overweight. One woman told me (in her broken English) that she was proud of her broad shoulders and chest. I hi-fived her and we both had second-helpings of fried rice.
(Later, I was told that it was a joke that the junior high teachers were in on. Okaaaay.)
BUT THEN! I went to the kindergarden principle's private party with Kyu-san and Mori-san.
It was hilarious.
They opened up the restaurant for the six older dudes and one waitress hovered about making sure everybody's drink was full. When we arrived, there was a loud cheer and more glasses brought out. Mori-san was made to sit between this dude
Kyu-san was seated there
and I was wedged in between two chain-smoking men with bad teeth and big smiles.
It was like I was a combination of escort/life of the party/geisha, which I think is how many Japanese women are viewed at in parties such as this one. That's certainly how hostess clubs work. And I felt weird, but seeing as the guys weren't trying to feel me up or anything, I decided to enjoy myself.
There was of course karaoke and seeing as this was the over-fifty crowd, I worked the room with classics such as 'Mandie' and 'Yesterday'. The dudes were all about it. One guy came up to do air guitar (with 'Mandie'? Aw, let a guy dream). The principal did drums with chopsticks and an empty water bottle. I got the waitress to sing 'Beat It' with me (she even had moves!)
and we all went nuts. I mean, these guys are grown men and they were running around like high schoolers,
accusing each other of being perverts or taking it in the butt.
Or making silly face. And this guy's a principal!
Their karaoke consisted mainly of Enka (a classic, 'country-style' genre that older Japanese go nuts over. It's pretty cheesy. Think 70s shlock).
There was also this bizarre English tune. I had no idea what it was about.
Whenever I'd be sitting down, I'd get a barrage of questions. Sometimes the waitress would try to help with a little translating and if they ever got inappropriate, she'd say, "Bye-bye!" and get up to serve someone else. She was cool like that. Kyu-san and Mori-san kept mouthing, "Daijobu? (No problem?)" and I'd raise my glass of sparkling apple wine and say "Kampai!".
I had a kickass time with these dudes, but I was exhausted from all the smiling and attempts at conversation. Some gaijin are employed as exotic hostesses. I couldn't possibly put up with this hostessing shit night after night and not all Japanese men are as cool as these guys. I walked home, mixed myself a Bloody Mary and called it a night.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Step Into The Jungle- Only Fifteen Blocks Away
What's nice about living in Kozu is that you can do magnificent feats over the weekend. Instead of hanging out at the mall or smoking crack, you can hike the jungle and climb a mountain. Seeing as I had no way of scoring any dope, I decided to climb the mountain.
On Saturday, I woke up with a mild hangover at 11:30. After a leisurely breakfast of Advil and coffee, I got my shit together and headed uphill.
Kozushima is fairly small and the jungle meets the village after about fifteen blocks. I puffed my way uphill, past gardens and chickens
and got to the trailhead. The trail itself has a beautiful entrance: tall pines acting as a sort of gateway into the jungle. Someone had thoughtfully left some bamboo walking sticks. I picked one out and started climbing.
Tenjo-san is only 572 meters ( about 1,876 feet) so it isn't a long or arduous hike. The walk through the jungle was beautiful. Gently rotting camellias dotted the trail, trees twisted around so as to form a canopy all around you.
The ocean sounded in the distance, and just when I would get a little lonely, these guys would greet me at intervals:
These statues are called Ojizo-san. They're all over the island, hidden away in little alcoves with offerings at their feet (coins, tea, Fanta grape soda). I was at the coffeeshop today and I tried to find out more about them. The proprietess spewed out a bunch of info on the little statues in Japanese, but could only say "Good luck" in English.
At the foot of Tenjo-san, there was a torii and another ojizo-san.
According to Fodor's, "..torii are meant to symbolize the seperation of the everyday secular world from the spiritual world of the Shinto shrine," but what the fuck do they know. It felt as if, once I crossed the torii, something magical was about to happen, all 'Princess Monoke' style. So I placed a coin in front of the ojizo, bowed, and passed through.
It was a bit of a letdown to run right into a group of tourists after that. They were amazed to see a gaijin on this lil island and they asked me where I was from. I gave them the usual America-jin eigo no sensei and they were all like, "Cool." One of the old dudes asked if I had a boyfurendo. I said yes and that he better watch himself or he'll kick his ass.
When I neared the top, I ran into a couple of coworkers, Ebihara-san and Fukuhara-san. Since I had such a late start, they advised me to get going to the mountaintop. I told them if I wasn't at the high school on Monday, to call the police. Fukuhara said, "You not school Monday, you dead. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Awesome.
I also ran into these sweet ladies. I don't know if they were gathering herbs for their magic mountain potions or just doing a little maintenance work, but they fixed their hair and posed for me.
When I got near the top, it was super cold and windy, but man! What a great view. Different perspective of the island. My shitty digicam doesn't do it justice.
Supposedly, Tenjo-san is an active volcano, but hasn't gotten around to spewing anything since 833 A.D. Still, a moonage daydream was waiting for me when I reached the top.
I had landed on a solitary planet. Crows were floating in mid-air, riding a current. I walked to the end of the trail, called my man and told him I loved him. Seems like a mountaintop is as good a place as any to proclaim your love for someone.
There were more trails to explore, but it was getting dark and I didn't want to get stuck on the mountain. I could just see myself dragging my two broken legs down the trail, trying to remember how to say 'help me'. I'll be back, a little earlier in the day and not so much booze in my brain.
On Saturday, I woke up with a mild hangover at 11:30. After a leisurely breakfast of Advil and coffee, I got my shit together and headed uphill.
Kozushima is fairly small and the jungle meets the village after about fifteen blocks. I puffed my way uphill, past gardens and chickens
and got to the trailhead. The trail itself has a beautiful entrance: tall pines acting as a sort of gateway into the jungle. Someone had thoughtfully left some bamboo walking sticks. I picked one out and started climbing.
Tenjo-san is only 572 meters ( about 1,876 feet) so it isn't a long or arduous hike. The walk through the jungle was beautiful. Gently rotting camellias dotted the trail, trees twisted around so as to form a canopy all around you.
The ocean sounded in the distance, and just when I would get a little lonely, these guys would greet me at intervals:
These statues are called Ojizo-san. They're all over the island, hidden away in little alcoves with offerings at their feet (coins, tea, Fanta grape soda). I was at the coffeeshop today and I tried to find out more about them. The proprietess spewed out a bunch of info on the little statues in Japanese, but could only say "Good luck" in English.
At the foot of Tenjo-san, there was a torii and another ojizo-san.
According to Fodor's, "..torii are meant to symbolize the seperation of the everyday secular world from the spiritual world of the Shinto shrine," but what the fuck do they know. It felt as if, once I crossed the torii, something magical was about to happen, all 'Princess Monoke' style. So I placed a coin in front of the ojizo, bowed, and passed through.
It was a bit of a letdown to run right into a group of tourists after that. They were amazed to see a gaijin on this lil island and they asked me where I was from. I gave them the usual America-jin eigo no sensei and they were all like, "Cool." One of the old dudes asked if I had a boyfurendo. I said yes and that he better watch himself or he'll kick his ass.
When I neared the top, I ran into a couple of coworkers, Ebihara-san and Fukuhara-san. Since I had such a late start, they advised me to get going to the mountaintop. I told them if I wasn't at the high school on Monday, to call the police. Fukuhara said, "You not school Monday, you dead. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Awesome.
I also ran into these sweet ladies. I don't know if they were gathering herbs for their magic mountain potions or just doing a little maintenance work, but they fixed their hair and posed for me.
When I got near the top, it was super cold and windy, but man! What a great view. Different perspective of the island. My shitty digicam doesn't do it justice.
Supposedly, Tenjo-san is an active volcano, but hasn't gotten around to spewing anything since 833 A.D. Still, a moonage daydream was waiting for me when I reached the top.
I had landed on a solitary planet. Crows were floating in mid-air, riding a current. I walked to the end of the trail, called my man and told him I loved him. Seems like a mountaintop is as good a place as any to proclaim your love for someone.
There were more trails to explore, but it was getting dark and I didn't want to get stuck on the mountain. I could just see myself dragging my two broken legs down the trail, trying to remember how to say 'help me'. I'll be back, a little earlier in the day and not so much booze in my brain.
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